i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
