i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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