All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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