eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize
