chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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