oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I love having hate sex.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
