Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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