I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
