so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
