Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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