yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
worst night to have a conscience
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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