K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
