hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
