but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
