i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Randomize
