you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize