I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
