THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
