I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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