Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
