wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
