my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
