We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
