Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
