Jerry, you need to find god
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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