Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
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