No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
