I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize