and i looked up. we had an audience...
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
