Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
