Kareoke will never be a sober sport
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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