it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
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