I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
