holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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