Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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