oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize