I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
