I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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