I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
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