No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
