Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Randomize
