My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
