Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I want to make a zoo with you.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
