as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
