So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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