I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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