do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
