No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize