he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize