I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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