This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
