I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
